If you’re struggling with the transition to motherhood or feeling overwhelmed by this tiny baby who needs everything from you, you’re not alone. I’d argue every mom has a hard time adjusting to motherhood, but there are ways to make the change a bit easier. It’s not impossible!

Is it normal to feel overwhelmed as a first time mom?

It absolutely is normal and common to feel overwhelmed when you become a mom. According to the Pew Research Center, 77% of moms feel pressure to be an involved mother. When you factor in what “involved” means, such as knowing everything about their child’s likes and dislikes, researching what milestones they should be reaching and how to support them, spending ample amount of undistracted time with them, and so much more, it’s no wonder women are feeling overwhelmed.

The postpartum period also comes with a lot of stressors. Suddenly, you are:

living an entirely new life and day-to-day routine

balancing new roles between yourself and your partner

navigating how to care for a baby

feeling incredible amounts of responsibility

body and hormonal changes

having to enforce boundaries with parents and in laws

How long does it take to adjust to motherhood?

It takes 66 days for a new behavior to become automatic for you – a habit you can do without thinking too much about it. However, motherhood changes every behavior you do, so what a huge adjustment!

You’re learning new behaviors and creating new routines, so give yourself grace. It will take some time to adjust and feel more confident in motherhood. In fact, the baby brand Munchkin supported a study that found it takes new parents 4 months and 23 days to fully adjust. So you’ve got this, mama, it just takes some time!

Ready to prepare your mental health for postpartum and have an easier transition into motherhood? Here’s something to help you!

6 Tips for Adjusting to Motherhood

The transition to motherhood runs a little smoother when you:

1. Know you can’t know it all

You don’t have all the answers to parenting, postpartum, or your baby. And that’s okay!

Don’t invalidate yourself as a new mom just because you have to look something up.

2. Acknowledge your feelings

Every emotion you have is valid because it is your experience. It doesn’t matter if Shelly from church showed up the Sunday after birth. You are the mom you are meant to be.

With that, you are allowed to feel whatever you are feeling. Acknowledge them. Sit with them.

Ignoring them or trying to push them away only makes them scarier.

3. Ask for help

Asking for help from others whether that’s with babysitting, cleaning, grocery shopping, etc. is incredibly important! However, I won’t overlook how difficult it is to be vulnerable in front of someone and admit you need help.

Push through this feeling and know that the right people won’t be offended that you asked.

4. Build a support network

If you are struggling with who to ask for help or who the right people for you are, you probably don’t have a support network.

As a mom in the 21st century, we don’t have villages to pass the baby around in. We tend to rely on the nuclear family, leaving ourselves and our partner in total control.

The modern-day village is a support network full of useful people who are excited and willing to help you in this motherhood journey. To get started today, here is the Postpartum Support System!

You can say yes to:

• Saving time knowing the answers instead of searching on Google
• Customized support designed to help YOU and YOUR needs
• Avoiding the stress of motherhood
• Feeling confident as a mom and as a woman
• Say yes to starting motherhood with the right people on your side!

I’m Ready to Say Yes to Support!

5. Rest and sleep when you can

Don’t scoff or roll your eyes just yet.

Setting the habit of resting when you can and sleeping when you can starts in the early days of postpartum continues to build on itself as baby grows and sleeps longer.

I’ll be honest — my son is 2 and he still wakes up 1-2 times every night. But that just means I’m going to bed around 10pm to prioritize my own sleep.

6. Prepare as much as you can ahead of time

This is basically a bonus tip for pregnant moms out there, but even if you’ve already given birth, you can still practice preparation.

Look to the future and note any transitions that might happen in your life. Prepare for them as much as you can.

* I want to point out that preparing is different than planning. Preparing is developing a tentative idea for the situations that might come up and how you can handle them. Planning is setting exact details for what you need to happen.

Always prepare for everything rather than plan for anything!

How to balance motherhood and self

Along with the 6 tips for adjusting to being a new mom, you should prioritize self-care to avoid burnout.

This doesn’t mean go get an hour long, $100 massage once a week. Taking 10-30 minutes for yourself each day drastically changes your perspective of motherhood and your emotional well-being, too.

Including yourself in the balance might look like:

• Taking a bath each night for peace and quiet
• Going on a walk by yourself
• Reading a book alone in your room for 20 minutes
• Starting a passion project or creative outlet
• Go out of your way to talk to adults, too
• Taking care of your body through nutrition, skin care, and exercise

Does motherhood get easier?

Motherhood is an extension of yourself. You’re creating and raising tiny humans who have a piece of your heart forever. Of course you’re going to feel aches to protect them at all costs! No matter what age or life stage they grow into.

So unfortunately it doesn’t get any easier, but we can learn to ask for help and cope with it more.

How are you coping with being a new mom? Share with us in the comments below!